Tryout season is here. The emails have started. The group chats are on fire. Somebody’s already posted a training schedule in the parent thread that made the rest of us quietly panic.
And if this is your first rodeo, welcome. Grab a coffee. Sit down. Because there are some things about this season that nobody puts in the club FB page — and I think it’s time someone said them out loud.
1. You Are Going to Be More Nervous Than Your Kid
Let me just get this one on the table right away.
Your child will walk onto that field, find a friend within thirty seconds, and start kicking a ball around like it’s any other Tuesday. You, meanwhile, will be standing on the sideline running mental calculations about their footwork, scanning the field for who else showed up, and pretending to casually check your phone while actually stress-googling the club’s roster from last season.
This is normal. It is also a little bit embarrassing when you say it out loud — which is exactly why I’m saying it.
Kids take emotional cues from us more than we realize. A lot of kids pick up on the stress of their parents. The anxiety you’re carrying in your shoulders? They can feel it. The best thing you can do for your child during tryouts is genuinely regulate yourself first. Take a breath. Remember that they are not being evaluated for a job. They are playing a game they love.
2. Tryouts Are an Imperfect Science — and Coaches Know It
Here’s something the process doesn’t advertise: it’s an imperfect process and mistakes will be made. Some kids may be overlooked, and some just don’t tryout well.
That’s a coach saying that, not a bitter parent.
The reality is that a 90-minute tryout session with 60 kids on a field is not a comprehensive talent evaluation. Coaches are doing their best, but they are working with limited information under pressure. A kid who is nervous, having an off day, or just not built for high-pressure performance moments may not show their best self — and that has nothing to do with their actual ability or potential.
If your child doesn’t get the result they wanted, it does not mean the coaches were wrong about everything. But it also doesn’t mean they were right about everything either. Hold both of those truths at the same time.
3. What Coaches Are Actually Looking For (It’s Not Just Skills)
This one surprises a lot of parents. Yes, technical ability matters. But the coaches worth playing for are watching for a lot more than that.
The golden rule: show confidence without arrogance. Coaches appreciate resilience, positivity, and team spirit. They are looking for kids who communicate on the field, respond quickly to instruction, and compete hard on every ball — not just the ones where they look good.
Good coaches will not only look for talent but character as well.
The kid who sprints back after losing the ball, who calls for the pass, who helps a teammate up off the ground — that kid gets noticed. Remind your child of that before they step onto the field. Effort and attitude are things they can control completely. Skill is still being developed. Hustle is a choice.
4. The Parking Lot After Is Its Own Sport
I’m going to be honest with you: the parking lot after tryouts might be the most emotionally intense part of the whole experience. And I’m not talking about the kids.
The adult commentary. The comparisons. The hot takes about which coach is looking for what and which kid is definitely getting a call and which team is supposedly already full. It is a lot. The “club soccer gossip business” is real — and draining.
You do not have to participate. In fact, I’d strongly encourage you not to. What gets said in that parking lot has a way of seeping into your car ride home and coloring the conversation you have with your child — who, by the way, just poured their heart out on that field and deserves a clean, quiet moment to decompress.
My advice: get in your car, ask your kid if they’re hungry, and talk about literally anything else for the first ten minutes. Let them lead. If they want to debrief the tryout, they will. If they want to talk about what’s for dinner, that’s a win too.
5. Getting Cut Is Not the End of the Story
This is the one that nobody wants to think about going in, but we all need to be prepared for.
Kids get cut. Good kids. Kids who work hard and love the game and absolutely deserve to be playing. It happens every single tryout season, and it is genuinely awful — for them and for us.
What matters most in those moments is not the outcome. It’s what happens in the car ride home.
No matter the outcome, your encouragement and understanding can help them feel more confident and less stressed. What your child needs to hear is not a tactical analysis of what went wrong. They need to know that you are proud of them for showing up and competing, that one tryout does not define them, and that you love watching them play — regardless of which jersey they’re wearing.
Cherish your child when you can, because you just never know what a negative reaction about a tryout can do in the long run.
Getting cut from a team can be redirected into one of the most powerful motivating moments in a young athlete’s life — if the adults around them handle it right.
6. The 2026 Age Group Change Adds a New Layer This Year
If you read my last post, you already know this is coming. But it bears repeating as tryouts approach because it is going to catch some families completely off guard.
Starting with the 2026-27 season — meaning Fall 2026 tryouts — youth soccer is shifting from birth-year age groups (January–December) to a school-year cycle (August 1–July 31). This affects every major organization: US Youth Soccer, US Club Soccer, AYSO, and MLS Next Academy.
The practical impact for tryouts this coming fall:
- If your child was born January 1 through July 31, they will move up to the next age group for the 2026-27 season. That means they may be trying out for a different age bracket than they expected — and potentially with a different group of kids.
- If your child was born August 1 through December 31, they stay in their current age group.
This is not a minor administrative footnote. For families with spring birthdays especially, this could mean your child is suddenly the youngest on a team instead of one of the older players — or vice versa. Rosters that have been together for years may need to restructure. Some kids will find themselves competing for spots in a new age group they hadn’t planned for.
The 2025-26 season will remain under the current birth year rules, giving everyone a full year to prepare — but Fall 2026 tryouts will be run under the new system. If you haven’t looked up your child’s age group under the new cycle yet, now is the time. US Soccer has a free Age Group Calculator on their website — plug in your child’s birthday and know before tryout emails start landing.
The Bottom Line
Tryout season is a lot. It asks your kid to be vulnerable and competitive at the same time, in front of coaches they want to impress and peers they want to beat. And it asks you to hold all of that on their behalf while pretending to be totally chill on the sideline.
Nobody does this perfectly. Not me, not the most seasoned travel soccer veteran in your carpool. We are all just trying to love our kids well through a process that is genuinely stressful by design.
So here is what I want you to take into this tryout season: your child’s worth is not on that field. Their future is not decided in 90 minutes. And whatever happens, the most important voice they will hear through the process is yours — in the car on the way home.
Make it a good one.
Were you nodding along to any of these? Share this with a soccer parent who needs to hear it — and drop your own tryout survival tips in the comments below.
Pitch, Please is a lifestyle blog for the unapologetically passionate soccer mom. Real life. Real talk. No filter.
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